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Monday 8 September 2008

Unforgiven Live Notes

00.57am
Hang on, give me a minute. I’m just booking my holiday. Worksop, Leamington Spa.....it’s all glamour, you know.

01.00am
Ok, here we go. Unforgiven, the PPV with the fake name that brings out the pedant in me. Unforgiven is not a word, dammit. I blame Clint Eastwood. Or whoever was in Unforgiven. I haven’t time to fact check, I’m working.

01.02am
Interesting video focussed a lot of attention on Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. Maybe they are going with that as the main event. Which is cool and all, but the impact will be lessened by the fact that last month’s main event wasn’t a title match either.

01.03am
Wow, a genuine PPV first as Todd Grisham is the first voice we hear for Unforgiven. I’m pleased for Grisham and Striker that they have been pretty good in their opening weeks on ECW, and makes ECW feel like the breeding ground for announcers as well as wrestlers.

01.04am
We start with Matt Hardy and The Miz for the first section of the ECW scramble, which as you have probably gathered opens the show. They talk about The Miz being known as a chick magnet, which is where the CM of CM Punk comes from. The CM, contrary to popular belief, does not stand for “Craves Momentum”.

01.08am
We could do with a clock, here, you know folks. The commentators are talking about things happening early, but we don’t know timings.

01.10am
Shortly after Striker name checks Pat Patterson as inventing the scramble concept (presumably five men coming at regular intervals is attractive to him) Miz hits the Reality Check but Matt rolls to the outside. The commentators say how clever that was of Matt to roll away to avoid being pinned. Hang on, if he has enough energy couldn’t he just kick out?

01.11am
On the Nelson it’s Chavo, and within seconds he has rolled Miz to the outside and frog-splashed Matt to gain the first pinfall. I like that, it was a logical pin without making someone looking really weak and emphasised Chavo’s sneaky, Guerrero-patented lying, cheating and stealing.

01.14am
This match is ticking along nicely. Chavo hid a cracking rolling kick which Striker referred to as a Lyger Kick, and Miz hit a cool double cross-body. Matt nails Miz with a Side Effect and picks up a fall. Matt is interim champion.

01.16am
Big Mark (I can’t called him Mizark, can I, because Mike Mizanin is in this match) Henry is next, and the other three gang up but get dominated to begin with, Andre/Big Show style.

01.17am
Henry picks up Chavo and drops him, all of his weight crushing Chavo beneath him. Henry is interim champion. Noticeable that for the three falls so far a different man has been pinned each time.

01.19am
I’m sure it wasn’t intended, but Striker talked about Henry’s X-Factor. Which was a move and faction devised by X-Pac, Sean Waltman. Mizark, as I mentioned earlier, was a nickname for Henry coined by the Nation Parody by DX, and it was Waltman who dressed as Mizark Henry.

01.21am
Finlay, to a big ovation, is next, and is all over Henry. We now have a clock, people.

01.22am
Right, the action is quick but I have lots of points to make. Firstly Finlay clocked Henry twice with the shillelagh, while the ref’s back was turned. Can you get DQ-ed? Surely not.

Finlay and Matt get Henry out of the ring, and Finlay strikes the North Carolinian with the Celtic Cross. Everyone has been champ thus far. Finlay is temporary champ.

01.24am
Not for long, Hardy pins Miz (I think) and is now desperately preventing other pinfalls. Miz has a huge gash on his head from somewhere. This is mayhem.

01.26am
You know what, I loved that. Aside from the huge logic hole of disqualification, that was very entertaining and performed sensible with logic at frequent points. Henry was not pinned at all.

It should be said that the commentators were tremendous. Absolutely superb. They pieced the thing together, and although they had the odd slip which I picked up on, for the most part they kept it moving, and picked up their excitement towards the end. It will be interesting not just to see the contrast of the matches but also the commentary.

The crowd were well into that too, by the way.

01.30am
Their usual rip-off, dah, I mean AT&T text poll, asks whether Vickie Guererro was right to not allow Big Show into the scramble match for Smackdown. Does that mean that he will show up?

01.32am
Cody and Ted’s big adventure continues against the 1980s heel but new millennium babyfaces Cryme Tyme. I miss Repo Man, he would have got on so well with Shad and JTG.

Cole calls Rhodes and DiBiase brash and arrogant. Yeah, because Cryme Tyme as so mellow and modest aren’t they?

Sorry, I’ll leave off the commentators a bit.

01.34am
Early offence by Cryme Tyme, including big Shad sending both opponents outside with a double clothesline, then JTG being propelled in the air by his partner over the top to take out both Ted and Cody. Cody may have genuinely hurt his arm. His bump was odd.

01.44am
Another one goes above expectations. I thought this was a really fun tag match, which moved along really steadily which a neat little finish to it. Hang on a minute.......

01.46am
OK, that was odd. Ted and Cody were getting beaten up post-match but some guy came and saved them. The guy looked like a white Haku, or was Carlito on the Big Daddy V diet. Judging by the fact that he is in developmental and would fit the second generation theme, I would think that it was Afa Jr. I’d think they’d give him a name and just say he’s Afa’s boy, though.

Back to the match, I did really enjoy it. I thought both teams came off looking just that – TEAMS. Good teamwork, good character progression (especially the heels) and a finish which made Cody and Ted bigger heels but didn’t hurt Cryme Tyme.

Just one big fault – what the hell was Cody’s moonsault all about. He didn’t need to do it, logically, in the bout, and sold it like an idiot. Actually elicited a laugh from the audience.

01.50am
Footage of Shawn being taped up before a cool recap of Jericho v Shawn. If you need this recap then where have you been and why are you buying this PPV. Perhaps you are a blogger on Wrestlign who doesn’t do their job properly. (I’ll let you work out who that is)

01.51am
The unsanctioned match is next, and they are explaining it as that both guys have signed agreements stopping each man suing each other or WWE for any injuries and preventing any liability.

Still doesn’t make it unsanctioned, but we’ll let it slide.

I’m guessing this will be followed by the SD scramble, then a short divas interlude before Raw’s title match.

If you’ll excuse me, I may simply watch this one uninterrupted and report back at the end. I’m not a play-by-play guy.

02.27am
I’m frustrated beyond belief. Mostly this was very, very good, bordering on terrific. Mainly, though, I can’t stop thinking about the holes that riddled this performance that for me have blighted it.

Firstly, I want to say that I don’t blame either competitor. Shawn Michaels, an injured man don’t forget, was tremendous. Jericho not far behind. The intensity was off the charts and I actually liked the emotion of Shawn’s which I would normally find to be over the top.

Second, Michaels leaving as the man standing and Jericho down was the right thing to do. HBK needed retribution of some sort otherwise Jericho would be dominating the thing too much.

Lastly, I like the fact that this leaves the room open for this to logically carry on.

My problems.......are many.

Firstly, Lance Cade interfering just watered things down. I’d have liked to seen him either told that if he interfered he’d be suspended or for someone to put him out of commission. More on that in a minute.

Next, the match was supposed to be the culmination of both men’s hate for each other, and something beyond wrestling. The emotion was there for that, but when HBK was in that much peril, holding his eye, with a torn tricep, if we follow things through, wouldn’t Triple H have given Shawn a hand? At two on one, couldn’t Triple H have evened the score. Beyond wrestling, remember. A true friend wouldn’t let their buddy risk his career, his quality of life, like that.

Triple H could have at least taken out Cade, pre-match or during it.

I have many more things I could go into, but the next match is nearly starting and I’m still typing. I will, though, have a huge go at the decision of how to end the match. Lillian, even putting on a little more emotion herself, in the preamble said “this match can only end in pinfall or submission.” And the ref stopped it.

The ref, Marty Elias, actually made an unintentional funny during the match when he asked Cade and Jericho “What are you doing?” Err, trying to hurt the guy, Marty, you idiot.

No-one wanted it to end like, and it just made them all look stupid. Why couldn’t Michaels have suddenly become overcome by the emotion and walked to the back. That would have been far better than the ref going against the ENTIRE POINT of the unsanctioned stipulation. No skin off the ref’s nose if one man gets hurt.

So frustrating. Mostly good, but so flawed at the same time.


02.35am
Let’s catch up. Shelton and Jeff Hardy have started the Smackdown title match. No falls yet. During the break between matches we saw a very, very good backstage bit with Randy Orton meeting Cody, Ted and man we now have confirmed as son of Afa, but it seemed they called him Monya, or something similar. They explained his background.

They faced Orton and said that he now had to be impressed, but he laid into them for being too self congratulatory. I like the feel to this and it’s good to keep Orton involved in this manner.

02.37am
Ok, competitor three is joining in, and it’s Kendrick, along with big Zeke. No action to call as yet.

02.40am
Jeff picks up a pinfall over Kendrick with his new Powerbomb into a faceplant move. I recall it may have Tori’s finisher some years ago.

02.41am
Jeff tried to pin Shelton, and JR commended Hardy’s attitude. Which is doubly idiotic, because Jeff doesn’t get two ahead by getting an extra pin. It’s not an ironman match.

02.42am
Quickly after the above foolishness, Shelton hits paydirt (ridiculous name) but Kendrick breaks up the count. This actually makes sense, because Kendrick can then hit Sliced Bread (I’m not calling it The Kendrick. That’s like Shelton’s finisher being called The Benjamin, or Triple H’s being “The Helmsley”

Anyway, Kendrick is now the interim champion, a term which makes more sense than current champion, but one they seem to have abandoned.

02.45am
MVP entered a couple of minutes ago, and much like the first Scramble things are escalating. More moves being hit, with Kendrick looking particularly good. Impressive for him since this is his first time at this level. If someone had told you six months ago that Brian Kendrick (the artist formerly known as Spanky) would be starring at a PPV in a WWE Title match you’d have laughed and suggested that maybe Paul London would be UFC Heavyweight champion, then.

02.48am
Big reaction for Triple H. On one hand it could be easy to criticise Triple H for coming into this last (I sort of did in my preview) but at least it gave the other guys a chance to shine.

02.49am
With just over four minutes left Triple H pedigrees, and pins, Brian Kendrick. The Game is back in the saddle.

02.51am
With about three minutes to go, Hardy pins MVP after a Twist of Fate, and is Champeen again. Hardy takes too much of a Sliced Brian (I’ve compromised) he was supposed to avoid then gets stitched up by Triple H.

Nice little exchange here, because Triple H beat Kendrick again with a Pedigree, but while he was recovering from his exertions, Jeff hit a Swanton and went back in control.

02.53am
Hardy took Triple H to the outside and hit a plancha, leaving the other three to do an amazing tower of doom spot, initiated by Shelton.

Back in, Hardy cleaned house, hitting another Swanton, but left Triple H to pedigree MVP to get the pin with one second left. Hardy actually did a really clever thing which went unappreciated, which was that he cover Shelton, but the announcers never called it. The theory, as I saw it, was that as soon as Triple H finished his cover Hardy could get his. They didn’t call it though.

02.54am
Great stuff. This was really slow for ten minutes, but perhaps that helps because you get the slow build and the anticipation rises.

Post match Triple H and Jeff Hardy acknowledged how close they were to losing and winning respectively, and shook hands mid ring. Nice touch, except that if the two of them face-off next PPV, we’ll probably get the old ‘respect’ thing for a month and have a cold build up to a match which would be better if they had a spark. Maybe they will, we’ll see.

03.01am
More backstage stuff, and we get a great promo by Michaels which basically confirms that Jericho and he will keep going for a bit yet.

Next, Punk is interviewed by Eve (and was booed a little when he appeared) and the obligatory interruption comes from Orton. Nice to and fro before it’s Ted and ‘Fro.....and Cody, who interject. Yeah, that was a little weak, I’m sorry.

The Tag Champs plus their new buddy beat down Punk, and Kofi comes to help but to no avail. So Kofi can help Punk who he has never acknowledged on TV, but Triple H doesn’t assist Shawn. Ok then.

Orton tees off on Punk’s head with a great kick which the camera caught splendidly, and the heels leave, with Orton telling the other guys that he found those actions truly impressive.

03.05am
Back in the ring, we are several minutes into a very important segment. This audience have to get some refreshments at some point.

Maryse and Michelle are having a snoozefest of sloppy ‘wrestling’, with even a ‘boring’ chant being beyond the audience.

Michelle is so devoid of emotion, talent and charisma there is no reason to support her. Maryse, to her part, is a vaguely decent heel. Can’t wrestle though. Maryse actually wouldn’t be out of place in the Beautiful People in TNA.

03.08am
Michelle wins. Four people cheer.

03.11am
Adamle announces that after Punk was attacked he mightn’t be able to compete. He says he might have to find a suitable replacement.

Soon, Show comes out to offer Adamle his services. By the way, Adamle didn’t say if the title is still on the line if Punk doesn’t compete. It seems that it surely would be, but nothing was confirmed.

Show doesn’t talk long, but asks the fans if he should be in the scramble match. They sheer halfheartedly, and he reacts as though they went bananas. Poo Show. I love the guy, but he’s just doomed to apathy.

03.14am
Vickie is out to berate him, and is interrupted by choir music and a bunch of druids wheeling a huge coffin. Show is pissing himself laughing, which looks like overacting, which suggests SHENANIGANS to me. (I love that word, so I capitalised it.)

His celebratory attitude would work if Vickie looked freaked out, but she doesn’t. One of them has missed the pitch of this, but I don’t know which. Mind you, in indicating to her that she’ll be kicked out he raised a chuckle from me.

03.17am
Taker on the big screen. Threatening Vickie with murder. Well, he got away with killing Edge, apparently, so he might as well go for 2-0.

Show hold Vickie while Taker now approaches. I’m sure Show will nail Taker now, but let’s see. There is just too much hamming going on in the ring for there not to be a swerve. Vickie bolts but Show retrieves her. Is Show now an acolyte or something?

Taker takes an eternity to get to the ring as normal, which must be great news for CM Punk, trying to come to in the back.

03.20am
Look at the time-checks I’m going on this to see how long this is taking. Talk about padding this out.

Taker taking his hat off........

03.22am
Show attacks Taker. Wow, didn’t see that coming (note sarcasm). They just make things so bloody obvious. Show was blatantly hovering and waiting for Taker, and his overacting (both his and Vickie’s overacting, actually) ended up telegraphing this.

03.26am
Show finishes his slow, rather dull, attack on Taker. JR says that if this was a boxing match it would have been stopped. Or, Jim, a wrestling match with no rules. They get stopped too.

Vickie slaps Taker after Show held him, and then spits on him. Big Show leaves with Vickie, and completes the 375th heel turn of his WWE career.

03.28am
Segment ends. That was like 17 minutes.

03.32am
After Regal tells Adamle to look no further than him to replace Punk, we go to the ring for Batista and JBL to start the match. This is going to be an exciting five minutes............

Oh, and they flashed up and went through the rules of the match. Good Lord. You made the rules daft, then made them better, and now you can’t stop telling us. We’ve seen two scramble matches (two very good scramble matches) we know the f’n rules.

03.35am
Match (20 minute duration) starts with 25 minutes of the PPV to go by my watch.

03.42am
Dull, big man stuff so far. Kane chokeslams JBL to become interim champ just before Rey is in next. I make that 8 minutes so far, not ten.

03.45am
Rey has a huge Mohawk, but I can’t tell if it’s a Shannon Moore-like ‘do, or part of his mask outfit. Either way, Kane is owning him right now.

03.47am
No Punk...........it’s Jericho. He is selling the beating, and after a minute hasn’t hit the ring. They are well under time here.

This one has really dragged. They’ve run out of ideas. Many have said that the scramble was a good idea but three was overkill. Spot on, from what I can see.

03.49am
Three minutes on the clock, Jericho hasn’t entered yet. Still Kane as champ as we stand. Rey’s haircut is his own hair. That’s how dull the match is, I’m looking at hairstyles.

03.50am
Two to go, big moves being hit and no falls. Jericho to steal it?

03.51am
Kane gets a two count on Batista. More idiocy. 60 seconds left.

03.52am
It’s over. And our champion is............Chris Jericho. O...........K. What the hell happened there?

I don’t know if I’m happy or not. What I will say is that I like the idea that something huge happens on a PPV and people who didn’t watch go “shoot, I wish I’d seen that.”

I exchanged texts with a mate while that match was ongoing, and we listed Michaels, Christian Cage, Edge, Regal, Show, Kofi, Sid Justice, Rob Van Dam, Randy Orton and even Mike Adamle himself.

Some were legit shouts, many were just us having a joke, but we left out Jericho. I thought Orton looked likely, but in the end it was the Russo swerve – i.e. it was surprising, but made little sense. Why would Adamle select Jericho exactly?

The match was terrible, but I suppose it was never going to be great, and won’t be remembered because the finish will override the memory of the match itself.

Batista looked the most pissed off, so perhaps he is the first in line.

Looking forward to Raw. Lots to explain and clear up. Next PPV in 4 weeks. Should be interesting.


00.57am
Hang on, give me a minute. I’m just booking my holiday. Worksop, Leamington Spa.....it’s all glamour, you know.

01.00am
Ok, here we go. Unforgiven, the PPV with the fake name that brings out the pedant in me. Unforgiven is not a word, dammit. I blame Clint Eastwood. Or whoever was in Unforgiven. I haven’t time to fact check, I’m working.

01.02am
Interesting video focussed a lot of attention on Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. Maybe they are going with that as the main event. Which is cool and all, but the impact will be lessened by the fact that last month’s main event wasn’t a title match either.

01.03am
Wow, a genuine PPV first as Todd Grisham is the first voice we hear for Unforgiven. I’m pleased for Grisham and Striker that they have been pretty good in their opening weeks on ECW, and makes ECW feel like the breeding ground for announcers as well as wrestlers.

01.04am
We start with Matt Hardy and The Miz for the first section of the ECW scramble, which as you have probably gathered opens the show. They talk about The Miz being known as a chick magnet, which is where the CM of CM Punk comes from. The CM, contrary to popular belief, does not stand for “Craves Momentum”.

01.08am
We could do with a clock, here, you know folks. The commentators are talking about things happening early, but we don’t know timings.

01.10am
Shortly after Striker name checks Pat Patterson as inventing the scramble concept (presumably five men coming at regular intervals is attractive to him) Miz hits the Reality Check but Matt rolls to the outside. The commentators say how clever that was of Matt to roll away to avoid being pinned. Hang on, if he has enough energy couldn’t he just kick out?

01.11am
On the Nelson it’s Chavo, and within seconds he has rolled Miz to the outside and frog-splashed Matt to gain the first pinfall. I like that, it was a logical pin without making someone looking really weak and emphasised Chavo’s sneaky, Guerrero-patented lying, cheating and stealing.

01.14am
This match is ticking along nicely. Chavo hid a cracking rolling kick which Striker referred to as a Lyger Kick, and Miz hit a cool double cross-body. Matt nails Miz with a Side Effect and picks up a fall. Matt is interim champion.

01.16am
Big Mark (I can’t called him Mizark, can I, because Mike Mizanin is in this match) Henry is next, and the other three gang up but get dominated to begin with, Andre/Big Show style.

01.17am
Henry picks up Chavo and drops him, all of his weight crushing Chavo beneath him. Henry is interim champion. Noticeable that for the three falls so far a different man has been pinned each time.

01.19am
I’m sure it wasn’t intended, but Striker talked about Henry’s X-Factor. Which was a move and faction devised by X-Pac, Sean Waltman. Mizark, as I mentioned earlier, was a nickname for Henry coined by the Nation Parody by DX, and it was Waltman who dressed as Mizark Henry.

01.21am
Finlay, to a big ovation, is next, and is all over Henry. We now have a clock, people.

01.22am
Right, the action is quick but I have lots of points to make. Firstly Finlay clocked Henry twice with the shillelagh, while the ref’s back was turned. Can you get DQ-ed? Surely not.

Finlay and Matt get Henry out of the ring, and Finlay strikes the North Carolinian with the Celtic Cross. Everyone has been champ thus far. Finlay is temporary champ.

01.24am
Not for long, Hardy pins Miz (I think) and is now desperately preventing other pinfalls. Miz has a huge gash on his head from somewhere. This is mayhem.

01.26am
You know what, I loved that. Aside from the huge logic hole of disqualification, that was very entertaining and performed sensible with logic at frequent points. Henry was not pinned at all.

It should be said that the commentators were tremendous. Absolutely superb. They pieced the thing together, and although they had the odd slip which I picked up on, for the most part they kept it moving, and picked up their excitement towards the end. It will be interesting not just to see the contrast of the matches but also the commentary.

The crowd were well into that too, by the way.

01.30am
Their usual rip-off, dah, I mean AT&T text poll, asks whether Vickie Guererro was right to not allow Big Show into the scramble match for Smackdown. Does that mean that he will show up?

01.32am
Cody and Ted’s big adventure continues against the 1980s heel but new millennium babyfaces Cryme Tyme. I miss Repo Man, he would have got on so well with Shad and JTG.

Cole calls Rhodes and DiBiase brash and arrogant. Yeah, because Cryme Tyme as so mellow and modest aren’t they?

Sorry, I’ll leave off the commentators a bit.

01.34am
Early offence by Cryme Tyme, including big Shad sending both opponents outside with a double clothesline, then JTG being propelled in the air by his partner over the top to take out both Ted and Cody. Cody may have genuinely hurt his arm. His bump was odd.

01.44am
Another one goes above expectations. I thought this was a really fun tag match, which moved along really steadily which a neat little finish to it. Hang on a minute.......

01.46am
OK, that was odd. Ted and Cody were getting beaten up post-match but some guy came and saved them. The guy looked like a white Haku, or was Carlito on the Big Daddy V diet. Judging by the fact that he is in developmental and would fit the second generation theme, I would think that it was Afa Jr. I’d think they’d give him a name and just say he’s Afa’s boy, though.

Back to the match, I did really enjoy it. I thought both teams came off looking just that – TEAMS. Good teamwork, good character progression (especially the heels) and a finish which made Cody and Ted bigger heels but didn’t hurt Cryme Tyme.

Just one big fault – what the hell was Cody’s moonsault all about. He didn’t need to do it, logically, in the bout, and sold it like an idiot. Actually elicited a laugh from the audience.

01.50am
Footage of Shawn being taped up before a cool recap of Jericho v Shawn. If you need this recap then where have you been and why are you buying this PPV. Perhaps you are a blogger on Wrestlign who doesn’t do their job properly. (I’ll let you work out who that is)

01.51am
The unsanctioned match is next, and they are explaining it as that both guys have signed agreements stopping each man suing each other or WWE for any injuries and preventing any liability.

Still doesn’t make it unsanctioned, but we’ll let it slide.

I’m guessing this will be followed by the SD scramble, then a short divas interlude before Raw’s title match.

If you’ll excuse me, I may simply watch this one uninterrupted and report back at the end. I’m not a play-by-play guy.

02.27am
I’m frustrated beyond belief. Mostly this was very, very good, bordering on terrific. Mainly, though, I can’t stop thinking about the holes that riddled this performance that for me have blighted it.

Firstly, I want to say that I don’t blame either competitor. Shawn Michaels, an injured man don’t forget, was tremendous. Jericho not far behind. The intensity was off the charts and I actually liked the emotion of Shawn’s which I would normally find to be over the top.

Second, Michaels leaving as the man standing and Jericho down was the right thing to do. HBK needed retribution of some sort otherwise Jericho would be dominating the thing too much.

Lastly, I like the fact that this leaves the room open for this to logically carry on.

My problems.......are many.

Firstly, Lance Cade interfering just watered things down. I’d have liked to seen him either told that if he interfered he’d be suspended or for someone to put him out of commission. More on that in a minute.

Next, the match was supposed to be the culmination of both men’s hate for each other, and something beyond wrestling. The emotion was there for that, but when HBK was in that much peril, holding his eye, with a torn tricep, if we follow things through, wouldn’t Triple H have given Shawn a hand? At two on one, couldn’t Triple H have evened the score. Beyond wrestling, remember. A true friend wouldn’t let their buddy risk his career, his quality of life, like that.

Triple H could have at least taken out Cade, pre-match or during it.

I have many more things I could go into, but the next match is nearly starting and I’m still typing. I will, though, have a huge go at the decision of how to end the match. Lillian, even putting on a little more emotion herself, in the preamble said “this match can only end in pinfall or submission.” And the ref stopped it.

The ref, Marty Elias, actually made an unintentional funny during the match when he asked Cade and Jericho “What are you doing?” Err, trying to hurt the guy, Marty, you idiot.

No-one wanted it to end like, and it just made them all look stupid. Why couldn’t Michaels have suddenly become overcome by the emotion and walked to the back. That would have been far better than the ref going against the ENTIRE POINT of the unsanctioned stipulation. No skin off the ref’s nose if one man gets hurt.

So frustrating. Mostly good, but so flawed at the same time.


02.35am
Let’s catch up. Shelton and Jeff Hardy have started the Smackdown title match. No falls yet. During the break between matches we saw a very, very good backstage bit with Randy Orton meeting Cody, Ted and man we now have confirmed as son of Afa, but it seemed they called him Monya, or something similar. They explained his background.

They faced Orton and said that he now had to be impressed, but he laid into them for being too self congratulatory. I like the feel to this and it’s good to keep Orton involved in this manner.

02.37am
Ok, competitor three is joining in, and it’s Kendrick, along with big Zeke. No action to call as yet.

02.40am
Jeff picks up a pinfall over Kendrick with his new Powerbomb into a faceplant move. I recall it may have Tori’s finisher some years ago.

02.41am
Jeff tried to pin Shelton, and JR commended Hardy’s attitude. Which is doubly idiotic, because Jeff doesn’t get two ahead by getting an extra pin. It’s not an ironman match.

02.42am
Quickly after the above foolishness, Shelton hits paydirt (ridiculous name) but Kendrick breaks up the count. This actually makes sense, because Kendrick can then hit Sliced Bread (I’m not calling it The Kendrick. That’s like Shelton’s finisher being called The Benjamin, or Triple H’s being “The Helmsley”

Anyway, Kendrick is now the interim champion, a term which makes more sense than current champion, but one they seem to have abandoned.

02.45am
MVP entered a couple of minutes ago, and much like the first Scramble things are escalating. More moves being hit, with Kendrick looking particularly good. Impressive for him since this is his first time at this level. If someone had told you six months ago that Brian Kendrick (the artist formerly known as Spanky) would be starring at a PPV in a WWE Title match you’d have laughed and suggested that maybe Paul London would be UFC Heavyweight champion, then.

02.48am
Big reaction for Triple H. On one hand it could be easy to criticise Triple H for coming into this last (I sort of did in my preview) but at least it gave the other guys a chance to shine.

02.49am
With just over four minutes left Triple H pedigrees, and pins, Brian Kendrick. The Game is back in the saddle.

02.51am
With about three minutes to go, Hardy pins MVP after a Twist of Fate, and is Champeen again. Hardy takes too much of a Sliced Brian (I’ve compromised) he was supposed to avoid then gets stitched up by Triple H.

Nice little exchange here, because Triple H beat Kendrick again with a Pedigree, but while he was recovering from his exertions, Jeff hit a Swanton and went back in control.

02.53am
Hardy took Triple H to the outside and hit a plancha, leaving the other three to do an amazing tower of doom spot, initiated by Shelton.

Back in, Hardy cleaned house, hitting another Swanton, but left Triple H to pedigree MVP to get the pin with one second left. Hardy actually did a really clever thing which went unappreciated, which was that he cover Shelton, but the announcers never called it. The theory, as I saw it, was that as soon as Triple H finished his cover Hardy could get his. They didn’t call it though.

02.54am
Great stuff. This was really slow for ten minutes, but perhaps that helps because you get the slow build and the anticipation rises.

Post match Triple H and Jeff Hardy acknowledged how close they were to losing and winning respectively, and shook hands mid ring. Nice touch, except that if the two of them face-off next PPV, we’ll probably get the old ‘respect’ thing for a month and have a cold build up to a match which would be better if they had a spark. Maybe they will, we’ll see.

03.01am
More backstage stuff, and we get a great promo by Michaels which basically confirms that Jericho and he will keep going for a bit yet.

Next, Punk is interviewed by Eve (and was booed a little when he appeared) and the obligatory interruption comes from Orton. Nice to and fro before it’s Ted and ‘Fro.....and Cody, who interject. Yeah, that was a little weak, I’m sorry.

The Tag Champs plus their new buddy beat down Punk, and Kofi comes to help but to no avail. So Kofi can help Punk who he has never acknowledged on TV, but Triple H doesn’t assist Shawn. Ok then.

Orton tees off on Punk’s head with a great kick which the camera caught splendidly, and the heels leave, with Orton telling the other guys that he found those actions truly impressive.

03.05am
Back in the ring, we are several minutes into a very important segment. This audience have to get some refreshments at some point.

Maryse and Michelle are having a snoozefest of sloppy ‘wrestling’, with even a ‘boring’ chant being beyond the audience.

Michelle is so devoid of emotion, talent and charisma there is no reason to support her. Maryse, to her part, is a vaguely decent heel. Can’t wrestle though. Maryse actually wouldn’t be out of place in the Beautiful People in TNA.

03.08am
Michelle wins. Four people cheer.

03.11am
Adamle announces that after Punk was attacked he mightn’t be able to compete. He says he might have to find a suitable replacement.

Soon, Show comes out to offer Adamle his services. By the way, Adamle didn’t say if the title is still on the line if Punk doesn’t compete. It seems that it surely would be, but nothing was confirmed.

Show doesn’t talk long, but asks the fans if he should be in the scramble match. They sheer halfheartedly, and he reacts as though they went bananas. Poo Show. I love the guy, but he’s just doomed to apathy.

03.14am
Vickie is out to berate him, and is interrupted by choir music and a bunch of druids wheeling a huge coffin. Show is pissing himself laughing, which looks like overacting, which suggests SHENANIGANS to me. (I love that word, so I capitalised it.)

His celebratory attitude would work if Vickie looked freaked out, but she doesn’t. One of them has missed the pitch of this, but I don’t know which. Mind you, in indicating to her that she’ll be kicked out he raised a chuckle from me.

03.17am
Taker on the big screen. Threatening Vickie with murder. Well, he got away with killing Edge, apparently, so he might as well go for 2-0.

Show hold Vickie while Taker now approaches. I’m sure Show will nail Taker now, but let’s see. There is just too much hamming going on in the ring for there not to be a swerve. Vickie bolts but Show retrieves her. Is Show now an acolyte or something?

Taker takes an eternity to get to the ring as normal, which must be great news for CM Punk, trying to come to in the back.

03.20am
Look at the time-checks I’m going on this to see how long this is taking. Talk about padding this out.

Taker taking his hat off........

03.22am
Show attacks Taker. Wow, didn’t see that coming (note sarcasm). They just make things so bloody obvious. Show was blatantly hovering and waiting for Taker, and his overacting (both his and Vickie’s overacting, actually) ended up telegraphing this.

03.26am
Show finishes his slow, rather dull, attack on Taker. JR says that if this was a boxing match it would have been stopped. Or, Jim, a wrestling match with no rules. They get stopped too.

Vickie slaps Taker after Show held him, and then spits on him. Big Show leaves with Vickie, and completes the 375th heel turn of his WWE career.

03.28am
Segment ends. That was like 17 minutes.

03.32am
After Regal tells Adamle to look no further than him to replace Punk, we go to the ring for Batista and JBL to start the match. This is going to be an exciting five minutes............

Oh, and they flashed up and went through the rules of the match. Good Lord. You made the rules daft, then made them better, and now you can’t stop telling us. We’ve seen two scramble matches (two very good scramble matches) we know the f’n rules.

03.35am
Match (20 minute duration) starts with 25 minutes of the PPV to go by my watch.

03.42am
Dull, big man stuff so far. Kane chokeslams JBL to become interim champ just before Rey is in next. I make that 8 minutes so far, not ten.

03.45am
Rey has a huge Mohawk, but I can’t tell if it’s a Shannon Moore-like ‘do, or part of his mask outfit. Either way, Kane is owning him right now.

03.47am
No Punk...........it’s Jericho. He is selling the beating, and after a minute hasn’t hit the ring. They are well under time here.

This one has really dragged. They’ve run out of ideas. Many have said that the scramble was a good idea but three was overkill. Spot on, from what I can see.

03.49am
Three minutes on the clock, Jericho hasn’t entered yet. Still Kane as champ as we stand. Rey’s haircut is his own hair. That’s how dull the match is, I’m looking at hairstyles.

03.50am
Two to go, big moves being hit and no falls. Jericho to steal it?

03.51am
Kane gets a two count on Batista. More idiocy. 60 seconds left.

03.52am
It’s over. And our champion is............Chris Jericho. O...........K. What the hell happened there?

I don’t know if I’m happy or not. What I will say is that I like the idea that something huge happens on a PPV and people who didn’t watch go “shoot, I wish I’d seen that.”

I exchanged texts with a mate while that match was ongoing, and we listed Michaels, Christian Cage, Edge, Regal, Show, Kofi, Sid Justice, Rob Van Dam, Randy Orton and even Mike Adamle himself.

Some were legit shouts, many were just us having a joke, but we left out Jericho. I thought Orton looked likely, but in the end it was the Russo swerve – i.e. it was surprising, but made little sense. Why would Adamle select Jericho exactly?

The match was terrible, but I suppose it was never going to be great, and won’t be remembered because the finish will override the memory of the match itself.

Batista looked the most pissed off, so perhaps he is the first in line.

Looking forward to Raw. Lots to explain and clear up. Next PPV in 4 weeks. Should be interesting.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

what are your thoughts on the champion losing the title but not even featuring in the match?